Time to wake up

Well here we are again another sad post unfortunately maybe one day soon it will be a happy post,but I wanted to write this blog because people think i am being hard on myself and or being to negative because I made a comment on my friends toneitup pic of her sweatshirts and said i would love one but they are to small,the highest is a large.
I know what size i am and what things will not fit so no way am i being negative just facing the truth and not ling to myself about what size i am,like how people lie on dl about their weight what they want it to be,i want to be alot smaller than what i am and im working on it,but the reality is the jeans i used to wear last year no longer fit and i am back to wearing my pjs everywhere i go,cause nothing in my closet fits and i refuse to go buy clothes cause i dont wanna be here any longer than i have to...Im trying things through trial and error and hopefully next week we will have a solution.

Believe me Im the one looking in the mirror everyday and seeing the spare tire that goes all the way around me to give me a tabletop booty and a stomach apron, so im not negative im just being honest with how i look cause theres no point in fooling everyone else and myself of someone that I am not ..
So thats all for now just wanted you guys to know where Im coming from and this gives you all an insite on my feelings towards all that.I could go on and on but i wont so i hope you all understand,and hope everyone is getting their workouts it xoxoxo

jenn